For better or for worse | How to love for a lifetime
"Marriage: a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters written in prose." (Beverley Nichols)
How to navigate through pain
Loss begets pain, but pain is not one-size-fits-all, so there are no recovery methods that work in all situations. We do have at hand, however, explanatory models of pain, studies that dismantle myths about grief and, above all, "a psychological immune system" that helps us recover from painful experiences.
How to manage parent-child conflicts during the pandemic
One can hardly overestimate the role the relationship between a parent and their child plays in forming a matrix for the child’s future relationships, whether healthy or dysfunctional. The quality of the parent-child relationship is essential because it directly impacts the child’s social and emotional development, and its quality influences the child's ability to deal with future conflict.
Appeal to ignorance: Why it is useless to hide behind your finger
The appeal to ignorance (argumentum ad ignorantiam) is an error in thinking which argues that a conclusion is true because there is no evidence against it, or that a conclusion is false because there is no evidence in its favour.
The illusion of connection
I sat slouched on the edge of my bed, blue light illuminating my face in the dark. It was the tenth time I’d checked my phone in the space of five minutes. I grimaced. Was something wrong with me?
Why much of what we know about ourselves is false
Two groups of participants in an experiment received a set of eight questions similar to those found in IQ tests.[1] One of the groups was provided with the correct answers, which they could use to calculate their final score. Thus, for them, the conditions for cheating were favourable, and the test results showed that the members of this group obtained, on average, a...
She loves me not | Friendship and the friend zone
When I was a child, I used to take a branch of locust tree and, plucking the leaves one by one, I would say: She loves me… she loves me not… she loves me… she loves me not. I cannot remember who I was thinking of when doing this; too many years have gone by since then. However, the refrain is still very...
A plea for leisure
"What is this life if, full of care, / We have no time to stand and stare." — from the poem "Leisure" by William H. Davies.
A guide to resurrecting New Year’s resolutions
For many people, the New Year is the catalyst for making changes they didn't have time or energy for in the previous year. On 1 January, the list of resolutions grows promisingly long, but keeping them can become a real ordeal in the tangle of daily problems and deadlines. Statistics show that even before the month of snowdrops, many of the commitments made...
Connected but lonely?
“Mister Watson, come here, I want to see you.” With this message, Alexander Graham Bell and his assistant, Thomas Watson, launched the telephone. The door had opened to distant, personal and instant contact.
Codependency: a concept too widely used to have a single definition
A word is dead when it is said, some say. I say it just begins to live that day. – Emily Dickinson
The problem of happiness
Would you rather “achieve great things or be happy?” That question was asked in a YouGov survey (United States): 81 per cent said they would rather be happy; 13 per cent wanted to achieve great things; 6 per cent were uncertain.
“You can be happily married to anyone if you try hard enough.” True or false?
Can you be happily married to anyone? The idea of happiness as a thing of one's own creation persists in our times, although its cultural sedimentation belongs to the modern age.
Escaping Neverland: Finding purpose, whether young or old
Making any choice denies the possibility of at least one other choice. When confronted with this truth, young people often find themselves unprepared for life’s big choices.
The need for certainty
As we look at ourselves from the outside, taking our life seriously becomes difficult. This loss of confidence, as well as the attempt to regain it, are both matters related to the meaning of life. – Thomas Nagel, View from Nowhere